Slave Girls Of Outer Space Part 1 Free On Smashwords

  Just a reminder, this is a fun sexy science fiction novella, free to all on Smashwords. It's my way to rewrite everything that follows the first 15 minutes or so of the movie "Slave Girls Beyond Infinity" so that it's not a piece of garbage like the rest of the movie is. 

Here's the link!

And here's the cover:

Jinkie Jenkins, Interstellar Sex Reporter: The Story on Durango 3 Now on Smashwords

 

You can get the novella here for $1.99

Da blurb:

"I'm going to be a WHAT? A sex reporter? And my beat is going to be WHAT?”

Those are the first words of newly hired reporter Jinkie Jenkins, right out of journalism school, when her editor, Grabthar Assurilogan of the Interstellar Inquirer, put her on the Sylphs of Space beat, aka the sex beat. Jinkie was outraged. She wanted to cover the crime beat, specifically, she wanted to investigate the most exciting story in the Human Quadrant, the kidnapping of an entire planet.

But Assurilogan insisted that she was on the sex beat, take it or leave it, and Jinkie was a reporter, darn it, so she took the sex beat, even though she was from a planet where women were encouraged not to think about sex, much less have sex, prior to marriage. And since moving offplanet, she had stayed true to her planet's sex values, or tried to.

Yet here she was, a sex reporter, and on the Sylphs of Space beat, yet!

Sylphs were a popular cultural phenomenon on most planets, sex-positive, submissive women who liked playing at being sex slaves and other things. And thanks to advanced nanotech that let them shape their bodies and minds to suit their desires, play they did. Bound and gagged and chained and collared, they played with gusto at pleasure. People were fascinated by the doings of sylphs and the people who played with them, which is why they were a staple of sex reporting.

On her first assignment, Yahoo City on the rural planet of Durango 3, Jinkie will find all sorts of people. There will be her local guide Pea Eye the woman wrangler, the most masculine man she has ever met. There will be hotmeat, the wise sylph. There will be hucow stampedes and barroom brawls. And there will be her editor Grabthar, harrying her via interstellar holograms about the chaos that Jinkie leaves in her wake as she covers the sex lives of cowboys, hucows and ponygirls on Durango 3.

Can innocent and chaste Jinkie cover the story of of this wild women of outer space without being overwhelmed by the libidinous promptings of her long-stifled sex urges? And will Jinkie ever make any progress in breaking the planet kidnapping story open?

You'll just have to read this lighthearted, sexy space opera to find out. It's a little over 23,000 words. If you're looking for a funny science fiction novella set in an interstellar empire where human beings use nanotech to alter their bodies and minds to suit their fun, kinky sexual urges, you've found it!

This book is part 1 of the Jinkie Jenkins, Interstellar Sex Reporter trilogy. Stay tuned for Part 2: Jinkie Jenkins on Sexquest Station.

Star Treque: Attack of the Kinky Slave Girls! -- An Erotic Parody (Collar World Book 6) Now On Amazon

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I enjoyed parodying "Late Night On Onion Station" so I thought I'd give parody another shot, this time a SLIGHTLY better-known property, "Star Trek." I'm a fan, watched TOS, the Next Generation and some episode of Voyager and Enterprise, as well as all of the movies. I even married a woman who went to Dragoncon wearing a tribble suit. I didn't marry her FOR that reason, but it should be noted that it didn't deter me in the slightest, in fact, it was cool to me.

So I felt fully qualified to parody Star Trek. I decided to base my parody on TOS, because let's face it, there's a LOT of room for parody there. Most especially sexual parody, since The Original Series was an unreconstructed product of the sixties, with Captain Kirk jumping on any green-skinned alien woman he can find and Lt. Baskethead (I mean, Rand) sexing up the show for no particular reason, a task soon taken over by Nichelle Nichols.

I didn't entirely confine myself to TOS characters, I included Lieutenant Worf (Lt. Rorf Woof in my story) from Next Generation mainly because I was going to have Klingons, too, and he would come in handy for several reasons.

For the same reason, I had an Orion slave girl ("Aurion" in my story) as a cultural attache on the crew, helping integrate the Orions into the Federation, or as I called it, the Agglomeration. Encountering the Empire of the Collar (essentially, Collar World in space with gigantic men, because why the hell not?) the Participation Prize crew would naturally call on an Aurion slave girl for advice on how to deal with such a sexy menace.

Especially since the Empire of the Collar is technologically far in advance of both the Agglomeration and the Klingons (“Klaxons” in my story). It would have made an interesting story for Star Trek, except of course that Star Trek would never have been sex-positive and kink-positive.

And of course, being an erotic parody I was free to follow the sexiest, kinkiest elements of the story as far as I wanted to, which was very far, indeed. And I did not neglect the humor either, I had a LOT of fun with story and characters.

It's a shame media Trek could never follow where I have gone before. I've been to science fiction conventions, I've SEEN what the fan base gets up to, left on their own. They would have loved it. In the meantime, there's my parody, I'm hoping fans will love it. Maybe you will, too. Either way, live long and pump her.

Somebody Has Written A Parody of "Date Night On Union Station" and I'm Pretty Sure It Was Me

Click here to go to Amazon. Free on Kindle Unlimited!

If you LOVED Date Night On Union Station (Book 1 of the EarthCent Ambassador series) you'll LOVE Late Nights On Onion Station the sexy, sexy parody of "Date Night on Union Station" written by the infamous Pat Powers, author of Crazy Aunts and Scary Uncles and Jenkie Jenkins, Interstellar Sex Reporter.

Onion Station lies in the outermost reaches of human-explored space, a gigantic artifact created by the alien Zuks, artificial intelligences that are so badly programmed that they are extreme libertarians. They run Onion Station with a fine disregard for safety, comfort and well-being of the various alien species that dwell in their station, including the humans.

But it's the beings who live in Onion Station that make it the unique, exciting and strange place that it is, and when the Earth Ambassador to Onion Station starts dating an actual human man (much to her mother's relief) everything changes on Onion Station. This simple act of dating will bring together a fascinating group of characters:

Kitty Reinhardt, the human ambassador to Onion Station, is totally dedicated to her work. She earns the 25 cents an hour that the tight-fisted Zuks pay her the hard way, i.e., attending diplomatic receptions and helping Earth firms negotiate trade deals with the many other alien races in Zuk space. She's proud of what she does for humans in her role as ambassador (but it is too bad about the starving people who die regularly in the lower corridors of the human sector of Onion Station). But it's her relationship with her more than just comfortable chair that is a source of deep shame to her, even though she's not at all guilty about her taste for kinky maledom/femsub bondage sex.

Mike Bonus, the trader with a heart of gold who buys the contracts of starving humans by the dozens on the cheap at Onion Station and sells them off to slave traders on crapsack worlds for a fat profit – and who is revered as a saint by the humans whose contracts he sells.

Kitty Reinhardt's chair, which seems sentient to Kitty, given that it converses with her and does things to her that previously were confined to safely nonsentient machines like vibrators -- but which the Zuks SWEAR is not sentient.

The Sisters of Mercy, who rescue starving humans crawling through the mean corridors of Union Station ... but whom many starvelings would describe as anything BUT merciful.

Dweezil the Dreddarian, a six-limbed otterlike alien with a sharp eye for info-trading and a very commercial approach to friendship.

The Fringe, treelike aliens who have a taste for Earth epiphytes to hang in their canopies.

And the Zuks, the artificial intelligences who run Onion Station and live in fear of the massive artificial intelligence that runs the station itself, because it's definitely one of your more godlike artificial intelligences, and it's just as benevolent as the Zuks who created it.

But most of all, you'll have fun, and lots of it, as a favorite series is parodied senseless by someone who has read and enjoyed every book in the series.

What can I say, I'm a sucker for space opera!

So go ahead, dig in already. And if you have not read "Date Night on Union Station" go ahead, get over there, dig in, you'll enjoy it! The whole series is on Kindle Unlimited! It's sexless, but it's fun. And "Late Nights On Onion Station" well, it provides all the kinky sex an adult mind needs to ... adult ... and it's ALSO on Kindle Unlimited!

My Fantasy Fuel Novel, “Slavegirls of Outer Space," Available for Free

So a decade or so ago, I came across the movie Slavegirls From Beyond Infinity. I did and still do consider the first 15 minutes of the movie the finest sexy scifi B movie ever made. Unfortunately, after that first 15 minutes it very quickly devolved into a tepid remake of “The Most Dangerous Game” whose only strong point was two pretty good B-movie actresses running around in skimpy leather bikinis, which, sadly, still leaves it as a top-level sexy scifi B movie even if the story is really old shit. I mean, almost a century old (first published in 1924) and has been remade time and time again in many formats, each more boring than the next.

I was so pissed off over the loss of what started out to be a GREAT movie that I did want any writer of erotic SF would do: I wrote a book based on those first 15 minutes, extending the rest of the story logically from the beginning, which involved an escape from a cargo hold on an interstellar slave ship.

Thus was Slave Girls of Outer Space written, to be the story that “Slave Girls From Beyond Infinity” SHOULD have been. The short blurb sums it up nicely:

 Join Dita and Maria, two hot, sexy escaped slave girls, as they romp through a galaxy filled with competing interstellar empires, artificial intelligences, aliens, space pirates, hair's-breadth escapes, space battles featuring starships firing ravening bolts of utter destruction, and hot sexy men. It's just plain fun, like watching a 1980s sexy SF B-movie, minus the stupid, plus the kink!

The first version of this story I wrote was a full-on erotic science ficiton story, with graphic sex scenes and everything. But while I was wirting it, somebody reported a ton of my books to Amazon as being too rapey for Amazon, which was really cracking down on the kink stuff, and about half a dozen of my books got banned and I got sent a letter saying I was a hairs-breadth away from being banned from Amazon.

So I rewrote the book, going back in and removing all the graphic sex scenes, leaving in the fantasy fuel because damn, anything entitled “Slave Girls of Outer Space” HAS to have fantasy fuel. But when I tried to post the story of Amazon it stalled and would not publish. It didn't get banned, it just got stuck in the works, and since I was a hairs-breadth away from being banned, I decided to take the hint and posted it to Smashwords instead.